Reference card · English conversation
The Hesitation Toolkit
Eight memorised phrases that buy you thinking time without losing the conversation. Print this. Keep it next to your desk.
Rule
When the next word does not come, make a sound, not a silence. A pause filled with a phrase reads as thinking. A pause filled with nothing reads as breakdown — and the other person takes the turn away from you.
These are not English you assemble. They are eight fixed units you retrieve whole, already memorised, with no grammar decisions inside them. That is what makes them fast enough to use under pressure.
A · Before you answer — buy 2–4 seconds
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That's a good question.
Safest of the eight. Works in a meeting, an interview, anywhere. Don't use it twice in one conversation — it starts to sound evasive.
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Let me think for a second.
Honest and completely acceptable in English. Buys the most time of any phrase here.
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So, the way I see it…
Starts your sentence before you know how it ends. Your mouth begins; your brain catches up.
B · Mid-sentence — keep the floor
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…how can I put this…
Drop it in the middle of a sentence. Signals care, not confusion.
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I mean,
Your rescue when a sentence goes wrong. Say it and restart the sentence cleanly — no apology needed.
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…you know…
Informal only. Fine with friends. Keep it out of client calls and interviews.
C · The word won't come — repair
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What's the word…
Invites the other person to help you while you keep the turn. Highly natural — native speakers say this constantly.
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It's like a…
Then describe the thing instead of naming it. "It's like a… small bag you keep money in." Never stop for a missing word — go around it.
Register at a glance
Where each phrase is safe
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Any situation
That's a good question · Let me think for a second · What's the word… · I mean,
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Work, but sparingly
So, the way I see it… · how can I put this… · It's like a…
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Friends only
you know · like · sort of · I dunno
The one thing to avoid
Long silence, and the untranslated Croatian filler. A stretched English uhh… is normal speech. Ovaj… or pa… is the sound of a person who has left the language. If a filler escapes, make it an English one.
Checking a phrase yourself
Before you trust any new phrase — including one I give you — verify it against real usage:
- SkELL — type the phrase, get up to 40 real sentences from a billion-word corpus, plus the words that naturally go with it. Free, no signup.
- YouGlish — hear thousands of real speakers say it unscripted. Use it for rhythm and stress, not just meaning.
- Cambridge Dictionary — marks what is spoken vs written, formal vs informal.
Grounding: Pawley & Syder (1983) show fluent speech depends on retrieving memorised multi-word units whole, which is what avoids mid-clause hesitation — full paper. Filler use as a deliberate strategy for holding the turn while planning is documented in this study and catalogued by type in this one.